Hi!

Have you ever considered visiting friends on another server, but didn’t want to spend that pesky server transfer fee?

Do you want to play a character of some sort, but you don’t want to mooch off your friends for golds and bags and stuffs?

Then do what I do! Follow the Big Bear Butt New Server System of instant playtime satisfaction, also known as the BBB9001X system! (patent pending)

It’s got to be good… it’s OVER NINE THOUSAND!!!! And hey, anything with that many exclamation points must be pretty damn exciting, right? Right!!!!

The BBB9001X system is so simple, you’ll be putting it into practise right away, in the comfort of your own game room! And best of all, the System is free to the first 5 million people who call in right now, and we’ll ship it right to your door. You just pay shipping and, ahem, ‘handling’ charges. So call right now to get yours!

Okay, you want more? I’ll give you a little sneak peek into the System at work.

The first thing you do is decide what you want to play on the new server. Assuming it’s not a Death Knight, then you make that character, figure out fun Professions, and pick a snazzy new name. Make sure that the new name will be something evocative of your favorite character on your old server, or the name people are familiar with, but also something new so you have that emotional break from your old, familiar characters. Don’t saddle your new character with the baggage of your old experiences, or the relationship is doomed from the start! Give that character a chance with a brand new you!

Next, play at least up to level 10, doing some Profession work like gathering along the way. Have fun, live a little. You don’t need money or bags or Auction House items yet, and even if you DID have them the prices people want for magic gear below level 10 is stupid, anyway. Just have fun, you can DO eet!

Once you hit level 10, though, you can pick a spec. You want to head out on the town, do some crafting, have some actual bag space, you want the bad guys to FEEL that repressive steel boot of justice firmly treading on their neck. 

So now what you do is make a Death Knight. No, really. Make a DK, level up, hit Outlands at 58, and go do some quests.

In a VERY short period of time, even in only one night, you’ll find that you’ve easily gathered enough gold to buy 12 or even 14 slot bags for your new low level alt, buy loots from the AH, train skills up and even sock enough away for that mount training at 20.

Best of all, once you’ve hit your gold level for that low level alt, you can take your Death Knight and go farm Ore, Herbs or Skins in a low level zone to feed your new alt’s crafting needs!

So what are you waiting for?!?

Don’t be a leech on your friends, nobody likes a freeloading relative to come over and slurp up all the good beer in the fridge. You know they were saving that beer for when Omnomnomnomitron bought it the first time anyway, right? Don’t be that person, instead, go out there and do the responsible thing…

..use BBB9001X today!

(Product not available in stores, order now to get your own free copy, does not slice, dice or make julianne fries. Use of product may lead to increased butt size and long-winded explanatory posts of excessive length. Do not use while operating heavy machinery, unless you are crushing my bosses’ car. Do not use while under the influence of drugs, and stop bogarting the pipe, dude.)
17 Responses to “The BBB New Server System – BBB9001X!”
  1. Hurric says:

    Started a brand new character on a brand new server about a month ago, I just hit level 49 (I don’t have alot of time to play) and with just questing, dungeons and herbing I already have over 800 gold. Seriously, pick up at least one gathering skill and just AH all of it, your gear won’t suffer and you will rake in the dough.

    Once I hit 60 I’m going to train my flight form and go level mining too. I can’t wait to flight form node farm, its been a dream since the first day I played the game.

  2. Lenaiya says:

    Lmao. I just choked on my lunch. Have you seen the dubs that Jabooody Dubs does on youtube? That’s what your “fine print” reminded me of. Hilarious.

  3. Inno says:

    Since the new server tool doesn’t slice or dice am I left out in the cold as I’d choose to play a rogue?

  4. Elynea says:

    lmao!!

    Love it!

  5. Paona says:

    Bear sounds just a weeeeeeee bit ticked. =P

    ….I should roll a new alt and see what the good ways to make gold at low levels on the AH are these days. Alas, Wool Cloth farming, you served us well.

  6. Saithir says:

    Actually bagspace on the new alt aren’t really a problem now – you get some small ones as you quest and (unless you’re planning on leveling by pvp/herbing *only*) you will do lots of quests and some dungeons as well, right?

    Might as well pick up the capital city reputation tabards when you’re at it – they’re availaible on Friendly, and on Revered you can buy yourself a 16-slot bag for less than 2 gold from the rep vendor. They’re unique, but every city has its own version and to be honest – 2 gold is nothing.

  7. Mhorgrim says:

    ROFLCOPTERZ!!!! You know it is fairly easy to do. ACCEPT! Some servers you would like to get on have ungodly overinflated thier economy. I have a horde toon on an RP PvP server that I love dearly, but when lv 6 greens or nether bags go for between 20-40 gold, it aint easy lol. Still most humerous post! Cheers BBB!!!!

  8. Apple says:

    *snicker*

    The julienne fries bit reminded me of the beginning of Aladdin… tell me I’m not the only one?

  9. Fangtastic says:

    Great suggestion about the use of a DK to bootstrap your empire on a new realm. :)

    If you use the mobile armory, there is a method you can use to supplement BBB9001X(!).

    I recently rolled anew on Thrall (awesome realm for the horde btw, loving it so far – trade chat is fairly friendly and clean for the most part, excellent progression, people are pugging all raids and all bosses – great for a dad who can’t commit to a raiding schedule). Like you said, I had no heirlooms, no gold, nada. I went with herbalism and mining as my initial two professions. A very nice new thing in Cata is that all the starter areas now have profession trainers that will teach you all professions. So I went about my merry way, herbing and mining while questing. Excellent XP from the two professions and I zipped through the levels.

    When I’d log off, I’d fire up the mobile armory and post my stacks of ore, bars and herbs undercutting the market by 1 copper. They sold really well and I was able to start auctioning well before getting a toon to a major city.

    Now I am level 21, I have 5 hours or so played in total now and I have 150 gold. And I have all the bags I need too. :) I figure that when I get 80+, I’ll drop these professions and replace them with whatever I want at endgame. But for now, the gold and XP from these two gathering professions is great and makes for a nice substitute for the BoA XP bonus.

    I hope you enjoy your new home. :)

  10. Tsudrats says:

    I always roll a DK whether or not I particularly like running them; the access to gold and … well … gold lets me feed the toon I really like to play. Gathering profs just boost them along sooo nicely.

  11. Tesh says:

    Would now be the time to point out that crafting professions are terribly out of whack with the leveling pace? Or that a sugar daddy DK is about the only way to actually make crafting barely relevant to leveling, as you have to buy materials to make junk you’ll never use? (Grinding up materials or questing both wind up with an overleveled character for stuff you can craft.)

    …yeah, I’m not bitter that I tried Leatherworking until Outlands, and then dumped it at skill level 284 for Mining… and then leveled that to 330 in a couple of hours, making 800 gold in the process. I’m not bitter… I just think it’s *bad* game design, or weird social engineering and wealth redistribution.

    Aaaaaanyway, now that I can make DKs, I’m sure their reason for existence will be money muling on new servers for random newbie alts. I can’t help but think that’s also bad design, but hey, I’ll roll with that.

    • bigbearbutt says:

      I agree with every one of your points, my friend. But as I’ve said in other posts… I don’t make the rules, I just twist them to my advantage.

  12. Nightwhisp says:

    Great Idea! But I would note that in some cases your disclaimer is incorrect; If your toon is a Rogue it infact does slice and dice.

  13. […] Big Bear Butt shares a handy system for rolling a character on a new realm. […]

  14. Gneisha says:

    My boyfriend and I used this method a long time ago when we decided to roll on another server for giggles. We picked Blackrock (I seriously don’t know why, it’s the most overpopulated server I’ve ever seen) and he quickly rolled a DK, leveled jewelcrafting on it to the point where he could prospect tin ore, bought tin ore in stacks, prospected, sold all the gems. Moss Agates were going for 16-17g a piece. He’s still got about 5k gold sitting on that server.

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