Been working crazy this week, getting things fixed that went belly up.

Today, I had a moment of pure ‘wtf did he just say’ that I wanted to share.

Had a machine get erratic a few days ago. Nailed down what the core issue was, a mixture of operators that are untrained but ordered to run the machine anyway, and a shaft that was slightly bent because, well, see reason number 1.

Folks in management ‘wanted to be sure’, so they insisted we fly in the manufacturer’s tech to troubleshoot the system for us.

I was all for that, seeing as how that way I can take the opportunity to have the manufacturer’s tech train the operators on the RIGHT way to do things. Sometimes, the ‘pro from Dover’ really is damn handy to have come into town.

The tech flew in yesterday, and what do you know, he found the shaft was slightly bent. He also spent over two hours doing training with our best operator, and corrected just a MASSIVE amount of training misconceptions. I did a brief write up afterwards, but the final result wasn’t very flattering. I’ll put it this way, there was a very good reason this particular machine was never able to run at top speeds, even when brand new.

On the positive side, I went over our maintenance procedures with him and he was quite complimentary about how well we take care of the machine. Aside from, you know, people who put massive weights on 3″ steel shafts unsupported on one end and then expect them to maintain true balance.

So I pulled the shaft this morning, crated it up and shipped it out the door. Manufacturer will receive it tomorrow, straighten it out and ship it back, we’ll get it on Monday. No worries.

The shaft is about 7′ long, 3″ diameter and solid steel. Things only weighs 150 lbs, but it’s an awkward bundle to ship once wrapped up.

I send out all of my email notifications, and then I contact the manufacturer to get pricing and availability on a replacement shaft to have in stock for backup, so if we have this same issue crop up again in the future, which God forbid will never happen again but wasn’t supposed to happen the FIRST time, at least I’m not down three days on shaft repair turnarounds.

Here’s what I get told.

Dead serious.

“Oh sure, I’ll get with the home office and request a quote on that. But I’m afraid you’ll have to wait to hear back on Monday. The offices in the UK are all closed tomorrow for the wedding.”

Wait, what? What wedding?

Is your company owner getting married?

“No, THE WEDDING.”

What wedding?

“THE WEDDING. You know, THE WEDDING.”

Huh.

Okay, well, thanks, I’ll wait to hear back on Monday then.

Geez, you woulda thought something important was happening tomorrow or something.

Closed the offices? REALLY?

Seriously? “we could be making some money right now, but to hell with that, we’ve got a wedding to watch!”

And people ask me why the economy is in the shitter.

34 Responses to “You got your sillyness in my serious!”
  1. Nyctef says:

    This particular wedding has a wikipedia page, so I guess it must be important :P

  2. Sythe says:

    I won’t be watching the wedding, however Friday has actually been declared a public holiday in the UK (to go with the existing one on Monday, four-day weekend ftw!)

    • bigbearbutt says:

      Wow… man, I could use a 4 day weekend right now.

      • Ngita says:

        We got our 5 day weekend last week, Easter friday, Anzac day on Monday and Easter Monday shifted to Tuesday, But today at work every body was chatting about the wedding and are you watching the wedding on TV tonight. Me : Wedding? Oh right those two, sorry I dont follow the womans magazines. I didnt get that excited about Di’s wedding and I was 30 years younger then.

  3. Tufva says:

    I’m sorry to disappoint you, but don’t expect to hear back until Tuesday – Monday is also a public holiday here in the UK…

    I’m not an avid royalist, but I am loving the royal wedding – since they have so kindly declared it a public holiday. As so happens it also ended up in pretty much the most perfect place too.

    Fri 22 April = Easter Friday, public holiday
    Mon 25 April = Easter Monday, public holiday
    Fri 29 April = Royal Wedding, extra public holiday
    Mon 2 May = May Day public holiday (always on 1st Monday in May)

    So for 3 days holiday (Tue 26 – Thu 28) I get 11 days off! \o/

    In our defense I will also point out that there is a serious lack of public holidays in England – we only get 8 of them per year normally.

  4. Ursa says:

    At the company I work for, we get New Years, Memorial Day, July 4th (sometimes), Thanksgiving, and Christmas Day. That’s it. Kind of a pain, but I can’t complain about the benefits. =)

    • Michelle says:

      Where I work we are only closed on Christmas Day… my fault for working at a tourist attraction but at least it pays well since it’s a government owned operation.

  5. Neil says:

    Well, either you have people come in, in which case you’re paying them to do terrible work because they’re focused on something else, or you just save the money and trouble and tell them not to come in at all. The latter isn’t actually that absurd.

    • Imakulata says:

      In my experience, big companies supporting foreign customers have part of their staff coming on public holidays as well so the customers get the service on the day they need it. The only exception is Easter, Christmas and New Year’s day. (There’s usually an exception to the exception for countries which do not have holidays on Great Friday or Christmas Eve.)

  6. Shatamall says:

    I’m not planning on getting up at 2AM to watch it tomorrow morning, but I do know a few people that are. I guess if you’re into that whole pageantry thing, this is kinda your Super Bowl, so go for it.

    Reminds me of this Portal 2 Announcement

    • Paul says:

      My wife and daughter have just now gone to bed (8AM) after having stayed up all night to watch the wedding.

      I heard yesterday that, worldwide, 2 billion people were expected to be watching.

  7. Kaleesh says:

    I don’t get it either. Royalty is weird.

  8. scaresome says:

    We’re the pros from Dover! Straight up M*A*S*H! Wewt.

  9. Tesh says:

    Priorities, man! Bread and circuses, remember?

  10. xiani says:

    I am from the UK. This has been a very weird week.

    There is indeed a ‘wedding’ tomorrow.

    The latest in a long line of gormless princes (an archaic relic of a hereditary monarchy the more enlightened of us are deeply embarrassed about) is getting married to some skinny bint, and lo, the nation must rejoice!

    Since the government doubts we might be entirely spontaneous about this, everyone gets the day off work on Friday. Also, next Monday (first Monday of May) ’cause that’s always been a holiday.

    The thing is, due to some random lunar/biblical happenstance, last weekend was Easter, and that was another 2 official holidays (Good Friday + Easter Monday), and anyone sensible who could take that as paid time off basically made a 2 & 1/2 weeker of it, and those who didn’t haven’t exactly been firing on all cylinders for the three days this week we are ‘working’ either – sorry about that!

    The upshot is that the entire UK has effectively been in holiday mode for the last week or so, and I doubt that fuck all of any significance (outside of endless, tedious ‘wedding’ reporting) has or will be done until next Wednesday at the earliest!

    I wish you luck with your, er, ‘wonky shaft’ nonetheless…

    • bigbearbutt says:

      Your comment was a delight to read. Do you by any chance have a blog or write professionally? I’d love to read more.

    • Paul says:

      So, how much money is the UK raking in from foreign tourism and merchandising related to the wedding?

      • MrCreepy says:

        Merchandising? I wouldn’t pay to watch the wedding unless she were getting married topless. Well, I may pay if the Queen were gonna be topless. Just for the novelty of it, I’m not that creepy. . .

        • Suxxy says:

          Speaking of merchandising: in Oz, we’re seeing reports of a pizza place in the UK doing a special pizza ‘created’ by an artist, with the likeness of Prince William & Kate done in sauce and decorated with pizza toppings (eg, olives for her hair, chicken for the faces). Don’t know if any are actually being sold.
          Just, wow!
          And a quick Google search finds
          http://www.businessinsider.com/papa-johns-creates-pizza-portrait-of-kate-middleton-and-prince-william-2011-4

          I’m not against the British monarchy, but I think some people have taken it too far.
          Oh, and if people think it’s weird spending money on the Royals, how much is spent keeping ex-Presidents and ex-Prime-Ministers for the rest of their lives after they retire? (Yes, they’re served in office, but the Royals are a tourist attraction and media fodder for all their lives).

          • Tsudrats says:

            Easter followed by ANZAC Day, a royal wedding and then May Day with it’s union marches. What a wonderful contrast the last couple of weeks have been.

  11. Tsudrats says:

    mm we’ve just finished a 5 day weekend here :) My theory about the UK however is that they’d have to shut down so much infrastructure on the day that no-one would be able to move about and thus well, might as well give everyone a holiday.

  12. Mannyac says:

    Eh, our Government (since it runs SOOoo effeiciently) will be taking off its 2011 holidays:

    Friday, December 31, 2010 New Year’s Day (Really !?!?!? and here I thought it was 1/1/2011)
    Monday, January 17 Birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr. (born 1/15)
    Monday, February 21 Washington’s Birthday (born 2/22)
    Monday, May 30 Memorial Day (Hooah or Oorah for this one)
    Monday, July 4 Independence Day (At least the government hasn’t tried to make this always fall on a Monday too)
    Monday, September 5 Labor Day (Congress should have to work on this one)
    Monday, October 10 Columbus Day (celebrating the discovery of a country he never actually set foot on)
    Friday, November 11 Veterans Day (Hooah or Oorah for this one, too)
    Thursday, November 24 Thanksgiving Day (signaling the beginning of the end for native americans)
    Monday, December 26 Christmas Day (the day is conjectured to have been picked so as not to lose a winter solstice celebration for Mithras…gotta keep the pagans happy!)

    Yeah holidays…

  13. honorshammer says:

    This was heard around my office :

    Girl 1 : Will you be watching the wedding tomorrow ?

    Girl 2 : Tomorrow? Honey, Bella isn’t marrying Edward until this Fall.

    Ah, priorities.

  14. Gumps says:

    Some may argue it would be wise for a government to organise a day off when services are likely to be disrupted due to a major event (however antiquated and silly) occuring on that day. Some may argue a single day off for people in the UK has less of an impact on the global economy than another government annually bestowing multiple days off to a much larger proportion of the global workforce for what seems to be no reason at all (*despite having previously lived in the States for a fewyears, I’m looking at Mannyac’s list in horrified bemusement). Some analysts have argued this single day off, while a huge inconvenience, has/will have a positive impact on the UK economy to the tune of hundreds of millions of pounds. I don’t know if I agree with their analysis, but I’m no expert and I’m an Australian republican (that means something a little different over here, btw) so I don’t care enough to read up any more on the topic.

    Apologies – I’m tired and cranky. I’ve worked all night and my job has been made more difficult by a factor of 12.38 because of the nine monitors in my office, six of those have been showing nothing but red carpet and a bunch of over-dressed, over-rich, scarily gentically-similar folk prancing about and waving to a huge crowd of folk who feel the need to cheer simply because the person standing beside them is cheering and noone wants to be the one to admit they’ve got nothing to show for their time other than aching feet and a cold kindly transmitted by the one guy in the crowd who sneezed without covering his mouth.

    Peace,

    the Gumps.

  15. Adanos says:

    “Seriously? “we could be making some money right now, but to hell with that, we’ve got a wedding to watch!”

    And people ask me why the economy is in the shitter.”

    True, but the economy is even more in the crapper when you also get the taxes to pay for said wedding, ohh the joys of the monarchy :P

  16. Staris says:

    I can guarantee you that the UK made more money on Friday than it would have made for whatever business you were trying to get going. The wedding has stimulated their economy and will continue for years to go. We have Kate’s pregnancy and birth and on and on. Just you wait. LOL

  17. Herr Drache says:

    No, I didn’t watch the wedding, but checked out some BBC online clips and pics.
    There’s so much “Bad Stuff” going on – Tornadoes in Alabama, wars or whatever you call ‘em now, neighborhood kids shooting each other, shooting up, daytime soaps, and nighttime shows like “American Idol” (aka: I’d boo you out of karaoke night!) that it’s actually quite nice to see something that reminds you of the “good old days”, fairy tales, princes and princesses, royalty, and a tad of pomp and circumstance.

    I understand that a lot of Brits (and others) have issues with the monarchy, it’s outdated, archaeic, and what-do-I-know-what-else. But here’s the thing, it’s unique! It’s a modern “monarchy”, rooted in centuries of tradition. It’s one of the last bastions of nobility, etiquette, and “proper behavior”, regardles of how silly or outdated it seems.

    I know, I may be old and grumpy, and being from “The Continent” and now living in the U.S., I’m also not objective, but I personally would rather have the modern monarchy, complete with the illusion of respect and honor than, hmmm, let’s see:
    - Bush
    - Clinton
    - Bush (the other)
    - Obama

    who, all in their own way, have and are screwing up in more and more innovative, expensive, and destructive ways than we can understand.

    I need to go now and see if I still have the wedding on DVR. I’d rather watch that than the lies, excuses, and schemes from Washington, D.C. I need my dose of “illusion of hope”.

    Plus: That’s one good looking bride!!!

    Cheers!

  18. Colour says:

    Late to the party, but while I didn’t intend to pay attention to the wedding, I completely forgot about its existence late last week when the tornadoes unceremoniously whipped Alabama.

    We just got power for that matter, so while it sucked here, we thankfully missed out on all the hubbub (though, we did gawk at the crazy hats online when it was back.) My father works on Redstone Arsenal (programs Blackhawk engines) and most of the base has been closed for a week now, its wild.

  19. Bigguss says:

    I am disapointed that so many of you have such negative opinions on the Royal Wedding. With so much ‘bad stuff’ going on around the world i think we all could do with some good stuff. I believe that the UK is losing so much of its traditional ideals that the wedding is a perfect reminder of what it is to be British. The Pomp and Pagentry was wonderful and was a pleasure to watch.

    God save the Queen!

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