Edit for those that haven’t read comments recently… there are big updates below in the comments. Don’t pass them up, I still can’t believe it. OMFG!!!
I apologise for the horrible post title.
But it seems so very, very appropriate.
I posted my little recap of last night’s gaming, and then went on out into the World… of Warcraft to catch up on news.
Why look! At WoW Insider, my favorite column is up… Guildwatch. Let’s just see what’s up…
Hmm, okay not much happening there…
Oh lookie, there is a mention of a badly done Guild Application by a young mage. Doesn’t sound like much potential for humor, as a former Officer I’ve seen some doozies in my time. Poor grammer is only funny up to a point.
As an aside, haven’t seen that kind of idiocy in Sidhe Devils thankfully, nothing but gold in the apps we’ve gotten. Don’t ask me why, I think no one besides you guys has noticed we started a guild. And the asshats obviously see the ‘we aren’t a progression guild, we won’t gear you for no effort here, we just try and have fun and put Real Life first, no srsly we mean it’ Guild Charter and move on…..
I’m going to post it here in an effort to preserve it in case of future deletion of that thread.
Vulc 70 mage
1. Tell about yourself. Who are you? Where are you from? How old are you? You are working or attending school? im steven also known as vulc, ima outgoing like to have fun and play wow. very interesd in joining i love to raid and want to get into it alot more. and from what ive seen… ur an amazing guild
2. Tell us about your computer and internet connection. my computer is decdent, have to restart it now in then working on investing a new case and cooling station… my pc overheat’s, connection is very good
3. Tell us about your character. Guild, days played, spec., etc. Specifically…what guild did you come from, why are you leaving, why did they fail, how far did you progress? well i just joined celtic rage, herd about it from a friend, they stunk it up in tk 1st night i was in there. ive got over 110 day’s played and my gear is decent mostly made gear. 1093+ fire dmg
4. When are you available? Can you play during the day? Every night? mostly every night, from 5-11
6. Why do you want to join Paranoid? How did you hear about us? im pretty good friends with lof and i wana get geard before i go into litch king. i like to be around people that are good and serous at end game i was back in the day.. not the best but 8/8 t1 3/8 t2
7. How much gold do you have? How about consumables? not much trying to pay for a new trinket ( alchamist stone).
8. Do you understand what DKP is and how it works? Yes depending on the guild
9. Are you willing to abide by our rules, at all times, if we accept you? Yes i will
10. What do you consider YOUR role to be in the endgame? To dps as hard as i can and help the guild kill bosses. and progress as much as i can
Okay. Okay, that’s pretty funny. Why? What do you mean, why do I think that’s funny?
Well, okay, let me break it down just a bit. No big analysis, I mean this guy would never in a million years be considered for Sidhe Devils, call me an elitist prick all you want, that’s just the way it is. But I’ll go over what I think are the high points.
It is clear to me from his spelling and phrasing that he gave no thought whatsoever towards making a good impression with the people he is asking to join. The key phrase there is no thought. Do I want a thoughtless person, someone that does not even for a second remotely consider the point of view of other players, their opinions or thoughts or concerns, in my guild? Hell no. This guy is what you get if you are desperate for more bodies to fill a 25 man raid… and even then, I think 25 mans deserve much better than this. Let me change that to a 40 man. If you were desperate to fill an old-school 40 man, this was your guy. You know he’s only there for the loot, but while he’s there at least you’re getting some DPS in the raid.
Now, I could mention his line about “wanting to get geared before WotLK comes out” for why he wants to join, but hey, I’ll give him points for being honest about wanting to join a progression guild for phat lootz. That’s what he wants, that’s why he’s applying. Give him the phat lootz, and no one gets hurt.
I also have to give him points for saying, even inadvertantly, that his computer is decadent. I know it was a typo on his part, and he meant decent… but I now want a decadent computer. Somehow, I don’t think you get those at Dell.
He loses a lot of points for answering the question about gold and consumables, a question I see as being on the app form as a way to find out of a raider is willing to provide his own raid mats and consumables, by answering ‘not much’ and talking about the crafted alchemy trinket he is trying to save up mats for.
Let’s be serious… The guy claims to have a 70 mage and plays 6 hours a night, EVERY night. He says he’s broke.
I know a lot of people, through their choice of Professions, have a hard time making gold in the game. Our friends at WoWJones even have a blog because of the interest. But the guy is an Alchemist. Gee, do I know any other Alchemists at level 70? Lemme think about that one for a second….
Cassieann plays her main and several alts, on an intermittant schedule, and thanks to her effort and her Alchemy Profession she has bought her own Epic Flying Skill, Windstar’s Epic Flying Skill, she made within days of getting the rep both her Alchemist Stone and the Assassin’s Alchemist Stone, and even then provides ME with raid mats half the time and has, in her words, already saved up enough gold to by my fricken Priest HER Epic Flying Skill. Broke my ass. Hey, punk, if you are playing 6 hours a night five nights a week, go do some dailies and actually make some pots to put on the AH. Maybe farm primals and make some Primal Mights on your Transmute. In three days you can have your trinket. Lazy bum.
Still, we’re nit picking here. From what I’ve pointed out alone, the app is not too bad. But the cream, the uber goodness that shines out, is this little snippet…
well i just joined celtic rage, herd about it from a friend, they stunk it up in tk 1st night i was in there.
Wait, wait, wait a minute!
So, you are applying to join a progression guild, and you are telling me you JUST joined another guild that actually took your ass into Tempest Keep, and you are taking the time in your application to bad mouth THEM instead of telling me specifically about YOU.
Epic Fail.
Now, yeah, it’s a train wreck of an application. If this is your application… well, I’m sorry, but you’re only 16. You WILL get older. Hopefully, you will also grow in maturity. I guarantee, this can either be a learning experience for you, or another way to feel like a victim. At this point in the reading, I am thinking, “He sounds like a typical self-entitled asshat. But the poor kid is right at that age, he might be a good kid at heart and has absolutely no idea how this comes across. I’m glad I’m not that age anymore. Damn I was stupid at that age. Wow, am I still that stupid? Naaahh… Cassie woulda killed me by now.”
Oh…. but wait. It gets better. I read further down the application, to read some replies… and come to a reply made by Hickyfat, apparently the guild leader of Celtic Rage, who surprisingly enough had a little something to say about how Vulc characterized the Tempest Keep run…
Whats up guys,
Vulc recently joined Celtic Rage and has recently been removed. He did attend TK with us on our first night there and yes, we definitely did not do as well as we could have done. However, in the few raids he did make it to his DPS was less than impressive (Mages with less “stats” and gear were able to out dps him somehow). After seeing his performance, I offered up some suggestions. 1) Regem your green gems and get rid of that, dare i say, +8 resilience gem. His response - I don’t want to spend money for better gems when I am going to upgrade my gear soon (not what I was looking to hear). 2) Switch specs and try one deep in fire (10/48/3) was the one I suggested. His response - I’ve played a mage for two years and I’m not gonna take advice from a warrior. While it’s true I don’t play a mage or even another class other than a warrior tank, I do read about other classes and what is most “raid viable.” I don’t need to play a mage to know that a resilience gem has no business in any gem slot. As a raid leader I want to make sure that all 25 people are pumping out as much tps, dps, and hps as possible and if they are not doing so, try to help. Vulc was not open to change to help the raid and acted like a pompous tithead. Hence - hickyfat had to drop the hickyboot. Peace fellas - Good luck w/ Felmyst. Any questions hit me up in game.
BOOM! Solid Win. That, right there, tells me as an officer everything I really wanted to know. Do I have to explain how many ways Hickyfat just laid to rest any thought I might have had about taking this mage into my guild? Even if it wasn’t about progression, the close-mindedness alone… no, I didn’t think so.
But wait! Let’s not be too hasty! This might just be some self-serving character assassination by Hickyfat, right? Just because the guy says something, doesn’t make it so. Screenshot or it didn’t happen, right guys?
Well… let’s take a look and see how Vulc responded to Hickyfats’ allegations of prior conduct.
Warning: The following is NOT safe for gentle eyes that dislike profanity. I found it hilarious, however.
Vulc said;
yo kno hicky im not the a pompas fucking prick who picks ona mage whos is doing #2 dps in ur raid and is 16 go get a mothetfucking life u prick and also if ur guna fuck around with my game play ur guna have a fucking suprize waiting around the corner u prick
mmmMMMMmmm…. now that is just great, isn’t it? All worry I had that I was being a little harsh in my analysis of his application are simply blown clean away.
Oh, and I have to say… I love the implication there at the end that Hickyfat is gonna find a surprise waiting for him ‘just around the corner’ so to speak. Wait, is Vulc going to lie in wait and ambush poor Hickyfat? Oh noooeeesssss!!!!!11!
There are 7 more pages of this, and I don’t even know if I want to read any further. The drama is so perfect right now, and reading further may spoil it.
But just…. wow. WOW.
God, I love Guildwatch.
Edit:
Okay, I read further… it doesn’t dissappoint. I will add one new quote, from another memeber of Celtic Rage, who sound like good guys, actually. This noe really does say it all…
Oh… Couldn’t resist the opportunity to throw my 2 cp’s here… Yes, Vulc’s unwillingness to take constructive criticism after 3 days in the guild was a concern for us and he was on the ‘keep an eye on’ list… But just to let anyone who’s thinking of inviting this gem of a mage know…
As we entered TK for the first time his question: “Uh, what are the other mages in here wearing? I’m pretty undergeared, are they going to be able to roll on stuff before me when it would be a bigger upgrade for me?” Sent alarm bells crashing through my head.
Ultimately the clincher for his short-lived membership in Celtic Rage was the hissy fit he threw in guild chat last night because he’d “been in the guild for 3 WHOLE DAYS” and hadn’t been able to raid. Which would make his second hissy fit (in 3 WHOLE DAYS, mind you) the first was when he was not invited to join us in SSC as he was not yet geared and spec’d for the instance (first night in the dungeon, our first kill on Lurker - not your level I know, but we felt good about it ).
tl;dr: We don’t have green chat drama in CR. We weren’t interested in him spewing his indignant, mis-informed crap whenever he didn’t get his way.
As to second on the meter… *cough*bullshit*cough*
Not that Paranoid’s seasoned recruiting team couldn’t see his 10 spell hit for what he is…
Quote of the day:
Deloessian: I’m looking at your armory. I’m seeing a number of glaring problems, and I’m a rogue…
Deloessian: Your spell hit is at 10? What’s the mage hit cap Vulc?
Vulc: My what?
Deloessian: The hit cap… Rogue hit cap is 363 with precision… What’s the mage hit cap?
Vulc: Hit doesn’t matter, I’ve got good crit.
Deloessian: …
You know, I do have a confession to make; I like drama.
Not causing it, though. I like watching it!
Ah, but not just any drama. Oh no! I, sir or madam, am a connoisseur.
The particular flavor of drama I enjoy is the kind that takes the form of an illiterate asshat that goes over the top in being a complete tool to someone… and the entire incident becomes public.
With screenshots.
I love that. I really do. I love seeing someone be an asshat and get busted and receive the fame they truly deserve. It warms my heart.
For those of you saddened at my immaturity, my petty, vindictive nature…
I do not now, nor have I ever claimed to be a nice person. Please take note.
This last week has been oh, so very good to me.
First, we had this incredible idiot Mage that had actually rolled need on the Commendation of Kael’thas against a Warrior Tank that needed the item.. and the Mage won. And then, no wait, seriously, it gets better, and THEN the Mage rolls on up into the official WoW Forums of his server to post screenshots of his winning the roll, to accuse the TANK of being in the wrong for being upset!
Ah, the resulting smackdown warms the heart. The idiot realized too late the tragic error of his actions, and deleted his post, but fast-acting forum readers had already captured it… they knew they had pure gold on their hands. They quickly reintroduced his entire post in the first reply comment, to last forever and ever, Amen.
Random people in the forums start the whipping, but when his own guild comes into the discussion to announce they have /gkicked the mage, ahh…..
I am a horrible person. /glee!
But wait! There’s more!
On the latest Guildwatch on WoW Insider, I found an entirely new epic drama situation, where a guild officer got /gkicked because he rolled on a boot drop from Chess against the alt of a co-GM… and won the roll. And immediately thereafter, he got /gkicked by the co-GM.
Now, this alone would be funny… obviously the guy is better off out of that guild with that kind of officer at the helm.
But it gets better… the guy that got /gkicked, Shakkra, got whispered a lot from the idiot that did the kicking, Krazyhunter… and he took screenshots. Screenshots that appear at the very top of the Guildwatch article.
Grats, Krazyhunter. Welcome to your own personal 15 minutes of fame. Lol.
Lord knows gearing alts in Karazhan is srs bsns.
The whole thing would still be minor league, if it weren’t for the flamewar that takes place in the Guildwatch comments, starting almost immediately, as Shakkar himself answers questions as to what happened.. in a nice, friendly mature manner… and other illiterate asshats from the guild that are friends with Krazyhunter try to flame him.
There is just something so refreshing in reading a well-written, expressive writer being flamed by an ignorant, illiterate asshat. Because you KNOW what all the other readers are thinking… “I don’t care who’s right… that guy is stupid. QQ more, you amuse me.”
Hey, if you’ve got more examples of this kind of drama, let me know. Please!
I’m such a sad, sad person. But I can’t help it! I need moar!
As many of you are aware, when I left Legatum Ignavis and raiding, I decided to remain in and open up the guild that me and my close friends have held for years, Sidhe Devils. It had been where our alts kept their home, it had some guild bank space to stash low level mats and give us a place to park our guys without clogging up ’serious’ guilds, you know. An alt guild.
Well, in opening it up to new members, we knew we needed a nice website, so Cassieann set up a guildportal site. And we would need some voice chat options for 5 mans, so we got a small Ventrilo server. (Thanks for the link to the vent server service, Matticus, I used your website link to go get the server. Their front end and quality seems to rock.)
This morning, I got an email saying that some, currently unknown, benefactor had paid to upgrade the guildportal website to a full feature site. Now, it wasn’t Cassie or I, so we have no idea who did it… but we certainly thank you.
In the process, I put two and two together… new paid-for guild website with forums… a post about how to make a quick and dirty banner image… hmmmm.
So I went and made one, and it took 5 minutes, no Photoshop like I used for my blog back in teh day, and it turned out very nice, IMO.
If you are in the position of wanting to make a banner image with text and borders for your blog or guild website, I heartily urge you to go and read Pugnacious Priests’ post and have fun with it… if I can do it, so can you!
Tom Lehrer fans will forgive me for using that line as the post title after you’ve seen the full post, I think.
So! Hiya folks, end of a big week, at least around the B^3 house.
We have had quite a few exeptionally nice folks join over the week, and I have to say that, as nervous as I was about the whole thing, so far it’s been great.
As I’ve never been a Guild Leader before, and Cassie has never had an active role as an Officer in a guild, the single biggest worry we faced was; what do you do when someone you know and like from other activities asks to join the guild, and then turns out to not fit in? How do you possibly ever tell someone that is a friend, or at least a friendly acquiantance before gaming with them, that you’d really prefer it if they weren’t in your guild anymore, please?
Thankfully, that hasn’t happened. Several people who do write blogs have come over to make alts, just to spend a little bit of time with us and chat and play around, and everyone is actually as great to chat with as you could hope. It’s quite refreshing.
When we do get an asshat, and the law of averages makes it certain that sooner or later we will, I have absolutely no idea what the hell we’ll do. But as the guy said after jumping off the roof of the Empire State Building, as he passed the hundredth floor on his way down; “So far, so good.”
We do have a few more people than the level 10~ alts of bloggers, though. We’ve been extraordinarily fortunate to have a few people join with their mains, either from our server or as actual server transfers, and again, awesome folks, every one.
As time goes on, I continue to hope we won’t have anyone disappointed they came over. But it’s something I have little power over. All I can do is hope everything turns out well for everyone and be myself.
I will say that we now have enough folks to stealth instances and be able to tank, DPS and heal when we hit the boss. It’s something I’ve never had the right mix of classes amongst my freinds to do before, so I’m interested in seeing how it turns out. Okay, more than interested, I’m pretty excited.
I am at heart not a social butterfly of a player. In game, I get focused on completing a set of objectives, of arranging priorities, setting tasks, visualizing the objectives and then getting it done. As such, I flip back and forth between characters fast to mail stuff around to the crafters who need it, I hit flights and tab out to read up on the next objective, I focus-in on killing the series of mobs I’m farming for quest items or rep or whatever, etc etc etc. I just go silent sometimes because I’m not reading or typing in guild chat, I’m getting things done.
This crew has brought me more into interacting with the actual guild chat, because they are such a fun and lively bunch. Distracting is also a good word. But in a nice way.
I could link to all the people that have joined that have blogs, and give them shout outs, but I’m not too sure yet how that would work out. Some folks might not want to live in a goldfish bowl during their actual game time. I don’t want this to be “the guild that all those bloggers hang out in”, that fans want to join with thier alts to be near their favorite writers, because then the folks already here might get nervous.
TJ has said in the past (and no TJ isn’t in the guild, so all her amours, don’t bother coming over) that she wishes BRK would stop inviting all the fans that whisper wanting to be in their guild full of famous bloggers, because she feels that they are all just sitting around waiting for the bloggers to do neat tricks.
Now, I don’t know what tricks they turn over in TJ and BRK and Doomilias and Squekie Priesties’ guild. I think it’s best I don’t ask.
But if she feels strongly enough about it to wish BRK would stop, then it becomes something for me to worry about too.
I’m good at the pre-emptive worrying. I just want everyone to have fun and feel comfortable and at home in the guild, damn it! Now have fun! That’s an order!
I do get amused by how frequently I see the phrase “I am specced such and such, but I’ll go heals if the guild needs it”.
Umm… I won’t, why the heck should you? When I read that kind of thing, maybe I’m wrong, but what I’m hearing is, “I really like playing my character the way I already am, that’s why I’m specced this way. But I know most guilds force their players into cookie cutter raid specs because they don’t care how the players feel, they just want to raid. And I want to fit in and show I’m a team player and willing to help, so I’ll offer to go haelz.”
No. No, you will play your character how you want to play your character. If we need a healer or another class to do a run, either we don’t do the run or I will specifically look for someone that enjoys playing that kind of character, not expect other people to lessen their own fun.
In other news this week, I had an awesome offer from one of the Officers of the Kael’thas guild Redrum, saying that if Cassie or I ever wanted to go with them on the occasional Karazhan run, we would be welcome to come along. As long as we pulled our own weight, of course.
I think I can guarantee that Cassie and I will be talking with Popess a lot more, because we do talk about how we miss doing SOMEthing during the week. I do think Deadmines and Shadowfang keep runs for low level alt guildies will be fun, but come on… you know we love a challenge.
So if you’re in Kael’thas and you see a Redrum player go by, give them a /wave. That’s some damn nice folks over there to offer to let us go with.
And now, I will finish this post by doing my part to intriduce you to a genius taht may be so far before your time you have never had the fortune to ever hear of him before. A great man, a brilliant mind, a social and political satirist in song and verse, a soul of real fun.
Tom Lehrer is, in my opinion, one of the greatest minds of all time. Not the smartest, no, the greatest. Sadly, he had already retired from performing in, I believe, 1967, although I swear I saw an interview in print from 1972. I know that he had continued teaching past retiring from live performances.
But his music lives on, as CDs of his perfomrances can still be found. Dr. Demento, a radio show that I used to listen to in the service and have been unable to find ever since leaving, used to showcase his music frequently.
Tom Lehrer had done a song, called “Send the Marines!”, that I really wanted to expose you all to. He is most famous for doing “The Elements”, “Poisoning Pigeons in the Park”, and “The Masochism Tango”, but I really wanted you to listen to “Send the Marines!”, and to see what a beautiful thing history can be. To see, clearly, that what people mocked 50 years ago is still being done today with all due seriousness like we’ve never done it before, is a priceless lesson on politics that I think everyone can learn from.
I went looking for the song on MP3 to share with you…
Imagine my surprised delight, when instead I found an actual, high quality, live performance by Tom Lehrer on Youtube, along with lots and lots of his other performances, from a show I thought lost to history forever.
God bless technology. I really hope you enjoy this, and his other music, as much as I do.
Okay, everyone’s response has been more than overwhelming.
Srs. Thank you!
We’ve had offers to have us join cool sounding guilds on a lot of servers, offers to make alts and join guilds on PvP servers, and many suggestions to form our own guild.
For now, I have no plans to change servers. No matter how awesome your guild sounds, and I’ve read some really neat sounding guild descriptions from wonderful people, I am just not ready to up and leave so many friends I’ve made on this server.
I do reserve the right to make alts on another server to say hi to you, though.
Right now Cassieann and I have returned to our alt guild, Sidhe Devils, that we share with the alts of our friends Ina, Mark, Andy and James.
Originally, Sidhe Devils was to be a joke guild to screw with other uptight players. We each made female night elf alts, joined Sidhe Devils, and had a bunny rabbit pet. The idea was, someday we were going to do full raids with female night elves with bunnies out, and irritate the stuffy hardcore guilds.
Since then, it has stayed a fun light hearted ’staying in touch with friends’ alt guild.
Well, we are going to keep it that way, as a friendly, casual guild. We are just opening it up to new friends-to-be, that’s all.
Cassieann is done with writing a nice pleasant charter, and she has already added a ‘Guild’ tab on the blog frontpage.
If you are on Kael’thas (US), and you are interested in joining us, knowing full well there are at the moment a total of TWO active people in Sidhe Devils, then visit the guild tab to read the charter and see instructions on how to ask for an invite.
And while Cassie and I, and the Kael’thas realm are all on Central Time, our best friends Ina, Mark and Andy all live in Singapore, so if you happen to be on Kael’thas at a really wierd server time, don’t feel excluded. I bet they’d love a few more people to hang out with.
I intend to get a Ventrilo server and guild website that has forums going, because I like to be able to chat with my friends worldwide. But that kinda stuff takes time, and there is only so much Cassieann… umm, I mean I… can do in one day.
To quote Ferris Beuller… “Life moves pretty fast…”
and i wana get geard before i go into litch king. i like to be around people that are good and serous at end game i was back in the day.. not the best but 8/8 t1 3/8 t2
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