Are my expectations unrealistic?

I think that I am guilty of expecting too much from my fellow gamers.

Let me explain. this is long, but I DO have a point at the end.

I’ve been writing this blog for quite a while now.

And one of the very first posts I ever made was a rant about players that come to a raid unprepared.

I went on and on about how Kara is srs bsns, and you should be respectful of the fact that you’re agreeing to go on a raid with 9 other players, each of whom have things they COULD be doing, but they are here with you, intending to play together, challenge the fates and succeed.

I’ll recap about my FORMER expectations a bit. 


I have described in the past how there are just certain things we should expect of anyone that is going to join a raid, IF it was planned in advance. Things that you should do so everyone can go on time.

The most obvious thing, of course, is to show up on time. It is the very first thing everyone will notice, as they sit there at the Summoning Stone 15 minutes early waiting to be helpful and ready to summon folks to the raid. They WILL be sitting there chatting, and WILL notice if you log into your character 5 minutes after the set raid start time. It’s only 5 minutes… but when you’re sitting on your butt waiting to see if someone that signed up is even going to be online at ALL, it can seem like an eternity.

Far better to log on early, and then if you have things to do, you can let the raid organisers know you got stuff going on so they can rest easy knowing you are going to be there, even if you’re running a little late. Other people may appreciate the warning too, since now they know they have a few extra minutes if they’re farming mats for consumables or something.

Other simple things like being the spec YOU feel is right for what you are about to undertake. Don’t be PvPing right up until the very last second, then ask for a summons directly from the Battlemaster to the raid, still PvP flagged, get all the unsuspecting buffers flagged when they spot-buff you to get you caught up, and then announce you are still on your PvP spec and can someone ‘port you to IF to respec for the raid?

Or coming to the raid fully repaired. C’mon… even if you are a rock star, simple wear and tear over the course of a long raid night is going to bring you down, big boy. You need to start at above 85% Durability, at the very least.

Consumables? Hey, I love Mage Tables as much as the other guy, BOY do I love them… but if you are Friendly with the Shattered Sun Offensive, then you can buy Naaru Rations from Eldara Dawnrunner on the Isle of Quel’Danas. You don’t NEED to have a Mage in your group to have food and mana juice on the run, okay? Bring a couple stacks with yo. If you have a Mage, fine, you won’t need to use your own this time. But you’ll have them for when you need ’em.

And yes, I do try and carry plenty of buff food for myself and my friends, but if you are going to raid, roll your own. Don’t bogart a man’s Warp Burgers. If you can’t make the food yourself, you can certainly get the raw materials from any of hundreds of critters across Outlands… and I can assure you, you know someone in your raid that can make what you need, might even be able to make a fire right then and there… and would be delighted to do so.

Same with potions, flasks and elixirs. Maybe you can’t make it, but you can find out what the raw materials are, get THOSE and find a friend to craft it for you. And maybe they can get procs for extras.

And then your gear… oh my God, your gear.

It is your responsibility to play your own character. Thus, it is your responsibility to seek out your own gear upgrades, enchants, and gems.

Look, no one really gives a crap what exact gear you have on. Yes, some folks will look at the color of the item name, and if it isn’t purple, they’ll sneer. You know that.

But most people trying to organise a raid aren’t like that. They don’t care what the color of your gear is, what they want to know is, are you capable of performing your raid role at a level necessary to succeed? AND, have you shown you want to succeed by seeking out every advantage for the gear you DO have?

What do I mean? I mean it is up to you to determine by talking to a raid leader what your role in a raid would be, what goals you should set, and then try your best to meet them.

If you are intending to be a druid tank, guess what? If you ask me if you’re ready, I could care less if you are still wearing greens, or if you have a few pieces of DPS gear equipped.

What I’m going to ask is, what is your armor in Dire Bear form, what is your Defense or uncrittable status, what is your Dodge, and what is your Health? And I’ll ask you if you are using a feral tanking spec that includes 3/3 in Survival of the Fittest.

That’s it.

In that specific example, if I think that, on balance with the rest of the raid, you are weak in a particular area, I may ask you to go DPS on a particular boss fight I think you’d have trouble with, like solo tanking Prince. I may even go so far as to say that until you get your armor and health above X or achieve uncrittable, you can’t main tank it for our team, you’d need to offtank until you are ready.

Likewise, for healers, ranged or melee DPS… it’s not the exact pieces of your gear we worry about as raid organisers, it’s what your +Healing, +Spell Damage or DPS output will be, what your level of Spell Hit or Hit Rating is, and how prepared and practised you are at providing utility to the raid with your class abilities such as Chain Ice Trapping, Sapping, Sheeping, Shackling, Banishing and Fearing, casting Divine Intervention on the fly for wipe prevention, Misdirecting and so many others.

That being said… we will inspect your gear.

Because we want to know how serious you are about doing the best you can with what you’ve got. Sure, you’re in blues and greens, maybe a crafted Epic or two, some Reputation pieces, a few PvP epics.

EVERYONE starts out in the same place, at the bottom of the progression list, at level 70. Everyone. And not everyone has a sugar daddy maxed out level 70 to go farm for hours so their alt can get every good crafted BoE epic in the game for when they ding.

BUT… there is no excuse for having empty gem sockets. None. There is a green quality cut gem vendor in the Inn at Honor Hold (and likely in the Inn at the Horde city on Hellfire Peninsula, too). The gems are cheap, but they provide bonuses that are only a teeny bit weaker than the equivalent blue gems. Any Jewelcrafter can cut most green gems patterns, and while the raw gems aren’t cheap, they are only the cost of a daily to get.

There is NO excuse for someone attending a raid to walk in wearing a blue chestpiece with three empty sockets.

Enchants… if your items are weak, and you reasonably expect to replace them with upgrades soon, then no, people do NOT expect you to have the +53 Shadow Damage enchant on your weapon that costs 12 Void Crystals and 10 Large Prismatic Shards to craft. Of course not.

But where possible, you should try and have some enchants on gear that are your end game pieces. And you should always have every socket gemmed. It shows that you give the barest minimum of a shit about being the best you can with what you have.

Yes, I have ranted and blogged and whined about all this in the past before. many times, sadly.

The reason I’m talking about it now is NOT because anyone I know has been violating these simple ways to be prepared. In fact, things are a utopia of prepared, savvy gamers these days… so much so that it seems like everyone is on top of what they should be diong to be ready to go with what they have.

Hell, it’s been ages since I’ve seen the words “How do I write a macro” in chat, trade or otherwise, and I think that macros are a massive area of difficulty for even experienced players.

No, the reason I’m talking about it is because every time I think I have set realistic expectations for myself about what behavior I should expect from other people, I see something in the world that makes me stop dead, and say “What the f*^# is that? Are you SERIOUS??!?!”

This morning is one of those mornings.

I woke up, thinking that when I got to work I would prepare and post part 2 of Terin’s PBeM story.

Instead, I checked the news… and was so… stunned, that I had a hard time getting my brain started. I still am.

We play this game with people from all around the world. As far away as Singapore, as close as the guy two blocks down the street.

And there are certain things we can take for granted about those people.

The very first thing we can take for granted is that the person can use a computer, and can read.

Those aren’t small things, there. Those are pretty big accomplishments, which the older you get the more you take for granted. I work with plenty of people that just would have NO CLUE how to do what we do. None.

Many of them are over 40 years old. They have no frame of reference for the world we live in.

The next thing is that your life is stable enough to be able to play an online game that requires monthly billing (or a gametime card), and be able to afford the expense of the game and an internet account or internet cafe charges on your budget (or be stable enough to have college dorm internet or the equivalent).

Again, no small thing. Not at all.

Anyone that meets those expectations can be the person playing next to you in the raid. From any country, and society, in the world, as long as they bought a game account in the right region.

That person in the raid with you could be anyone, from anywhere… it’s part of the joy of the game to me.

Then I read the following news story on CNN.

And I realised that I am setting these high expectations of how I expect other people in the game to behave when trying to form a raid. And I am wrong. Dead wrong. 

My expectations are way too damn high.

Gemming your gear? Bringing your own Warp Burgers?

Good lord, that is nowhere near my list of priorities now. Oh, HELL no.

My new list of expectations is now as follows;

  1. Show up on time.
  2. Have a character that is not naked.
  3. If we are on vent, do not ever mention to me what you may be planning to do on the weekend that would involve shovels, a crowbar, and a box of condoms. Ever.
  4. Oh… and don’t tell me you have two friends that are willing to help out.

I just… I just don’t want to know. Dear God, I don’t want to know.

/blind terror


35 thoughts on “Are my expectations unrealistic?

  1. I could’ve made a joke about “Group of 3 LFmore, raid on Darkshire cemetary, pst” but I thought it would be in poor taste.


  2. Oh GROSS. You think you understand people, and then you find out you have no clue. I just can’t believe it.

    But I have to giggle @ the Darkshire thing 🙂 Poor taste or not, that’s funny right thar. Mor’Ladim had better be on the lookout!


  3. That is awful . . . however I have the odd desire to troll and necro some old forum threads with that link . . .


  4. Mitch, I myself have the odd urge to make a macro, so that every time my Warlock is in the Darkshire area, I can broadcast “Warlock with shovels and crowbar lF2 more, Eliza’s Grave.”

    But only because it would be a horrible in-joke.


  5. Wow, lol. I don’t even really know what to say…

    As to the first part of the post, though, I totally 100% agree… When I first started playing, I was a pally in a pretty intense end game raiding guild… we did all the 40-mans pre-BC, and then when BC came out, we got right into the end game in Outland… Then I quit that server for various reasons, didn’t play for a year, and now I play a horde beartank on a server with about a 1:5 horde to alliance ratio, a ridiculous economy, and a very slack attitude…

    I’ve just started doing Kara with another guild and it completely boggles my mind, the things that happen… I go to the summoning stone outside Kara usually 15-20 minutes before the raid is supposed to start, all decked out with my flasks, buff food, gear repaired, etc… then people will show up 20-30 minutes late, won’t have repaired, won’t have food or potions, or will just be flat-out bad at their class… it’s a total 360 to what was expected of me on my other server. Sometimes I wanna just scream at them, lol. It can get so frustrating when a Karazhan run takes six-seven freakin hours and you KNOW it’s just because people aren’t prepared, or aren’t paying attention…

    That being said, last Monday, I decided *I* would lead the run, and guess what… only took 4 hours. 😛 That’s because right up front, I told everyone that there would be no unexplained afks… no moronic aggro-pulling that causes wasted time with ressing/rebuffing… scheduled 5-minute pee breaks were in place for when after certain bosses were down… It was just a much smoother run when everyone was on the ball and paying attention.

    Anyway, I don’t really have a point with all this. ;P Just that I totally agree with the first part of your post. It’s sooo easy to come prepared to a raid, and it causes so much less grief and wasted time… So DO IT… every time…. everyone. 😀


  6. I know there is a horrible and wildly inappropriate joke here that could be used during the consort/succbus pulls before Maiden… in fact, in about every pull in Lower Kara. And Romeo & Juliet…. and…

    I. Just. Cannot. Go. There!


  7. I’ve not raided much at all, in fact only our guild excursion into kara but I’m with you about being as prepared as you can. It really boils down to respect; for others and for oneself.

    As to the lovely newstory…
    uh….. well…..hmmmmm.
    I, uh, BAH! TMI TMI TMI!!!!



  8. Several lessons here,

    Come prepared to the raid, if nothing else have a “grab-n-go” bag in the bank you can hearth to in case you get pulled as an on the fly replacement.

    Keep your gear repaired, it does not take much to stop by the vendor on the way to the bank.

    If someone asks to borrow my shovel, insist it be disinfected before returning it. Particularly if they also borrow a crowbar.


  9. As I learn the tanking roll I have been slowly tanking more difficult instances. Usually a few levels below me so if I mess up then then I have a bit of room to recover. I wouldn’t even think to be THE MAIN TANK in a raid without really knowing what I was doing and being fully prepared.

    About the news… You just have to work in an emergency department to realize that people who do this stuff and things like it are far more common than the general public knows.


  10. If you are raiding, and its not a farm content, then turning up without flasks, pots and consumables is bad form, turning up late without previously saying you would is bad form, and expecting the raid to wait is worse.

    The only point I disagree with is the mages, their job is to make cookies for the raid, the raid shouldn’t need food because the mage should make it. Its the same as a Paladin deciding not to buff because reagents cost money, its part of the job role and something you should expect. As a Paladin tank when I out gear content I drink after every pull, Kara can cost me 8g in food/water alone (drink after pull, buff, drink… someone went out of range, rebuff…). Everyone should eat / drink when the pull is on cooldown, or immediately after the pull finishes if you need mana/health, waiting for a heal or similar is silly and wastes time, use what is there, and mages giving out free cookies really helps with that.


  11. Someone mentioned that story on vent last night. He said he threw up when he read it.

    As for your raid requirements, my guild is actually stricter with Kara. We require the attunement since it tends to gear people up pretty well. Showing up with reasonable gear and consumables is the ONLY way to get a raid spot; our raid lead would rather not go than wipe all night because half the raid has empty gem sockets and no buffs. Like you, we don’t expect uber gear; just that people make the most of what drops they have.


  12. Shuddering after reading the news article…..being on the crux of being to old to play this game…in the 40 neighborhood…i remember in the part of the country im from Kids when i was one actually getiing seriously hurt and one death trying to act out D&D in real life. Also for raids i have been bad lately if i go with a pug i never have enough symbol of kings noob pally mistake but what can i say always wanted to be the ubber noob. Great read as always



  13. I think I should admit now, that the A#1 reason I posted that this morning, was that if *I* have to scrub a part of my brain with bleach and steel wool to ever feel clean again, then so do *YOU*.

    Pain shared is pain halved, and all that sort of thing.

    Plus, it’s always nice to get that raid preparation stuff refreshed every once in a while.


  14. All the other ickyness aside the mage point is a good one. I have been in runs with people that have invited a mage to a full run, summoned him over, got food from him and then said thanks and bumped him out of the run. Now it was a guild mage so I’m sure he didn’t have a problem helping, but that’s just silly. I always keep a couple of stacks of rations in my bank just in case I am low and don’t have time to jump over to the isle and pick some up before a run.

    I am just like BBB when it comes to a run. Even if it is on farm status you should still treat it like a raid. If you start taking it lightly then you will have issues with people doing the same thing with progression runs. I’m not saying dont have fun and try something crazy but at least keep in mind that these runs keep your group interactions sharpened and ready for the next one. I have actually burned myself out because it has gotten to the point where I have become an elixir vending machine for runs. We will be getting ready for the first pull and I have 2 people trying to trade mats to me for potions/elixirs and a whisper or two asking if I have mats on me to make things they need. All this with the first ready check up. Maybe I take these things too serious.


  15. News story – ugg

    Loved this in the post though – “Don’t bogart a man’s Warp Burgers.” Classic.

    you better believe I’ll be throwing that out in guild chat


  16. one little tiny minor detail I wanted to point out regarding gem availability.
    I don’t know about honor hold, but the thrallmar inn does not have a vendor that sells precut green quality gems. There is, however, a vendor that sells precut WHITE quality gems and also a trainer that sells the designs for cutting your own green quality gems if you are a jewelcrafter. Not to mention the vendor with a couple better-than-green gems (but not quite as good as blue cuts) for hellfire peninsula pvp marks. For metagems, there are the pvp vendors at stonebreaker/allerian who have a couple for just a few spirit shards from auchindoun bosses as well. That said, even white gems are enormously better than nothing, and on the auction house, green quality gems are still pretty cheap, too, so there really is no good excuse not to have all your gem slots full.


  17. Game Dame, you must have assumed I was insulting everyone 40 and over.

    Since I’m mere months away from 40 myself, I would think most folks might agree that insulting everyone 40 and over wasn’t really where I was going with that.

    I was merely stating a fact, that many of my coworkers, in fact the majority of them that I work with on a daily basis in direct regards to issues concerning electronics, computers, and digital processes, are, to my certain knowledge, unaware of the very existence of the online world in which we live.

    I was trying to make a point that, on the other hand, people growing up today in this brave new world take all of these wonders for granted, and indeed with a certain amount of arrogance and an assumption that this is the way things have always been. Clearly, I did not spend enough time making that point.

    It never occured to me folks would assume I was insulting an entire generation my own age. I didn’t think about that aspect of how it could possibly be taken. My bad.


  18. I’s over 40, but I knows ya meant well.

    Umm, yeah. No crowbars and condoms being a subject of discussion in Sidhe Devils chat, please. Otherwise I’s gonna get worried fer me young teammates over there…


  19. @Graimerin
    I’m over 40, and no way I’m near finished with this game.

    Sorry, but in Oz we have a saying “Only in America”, this fits into that generalisation perfectly.
    No, I don’t need links to articles about Snowtown, tyvm; we have our bizarre, but the good old US of A sets the bar high. No reflection on individuals, just with a population X times greater than our mere 21 million, there’s bound to be more crazies.



    I would be absolutely mortified if someone dug up my/a friend/a family members coffin (and body). FOR ANYTHING. Unless it was legal issues that were actually important.

    You are right, I couldn’t care less about what people do in guild now. Just show up and don’t tell me what you do IRL!

    I think I also may make up a fake name for kicks…


  21. So anyway, thanks for preempting a great article I had written in my head about raid prep, BBB. 😉

    I kinda know where Game Dame’s coming from, being closer to 60 than 50…and knowing more about computers than almost anyone else my age and most of those younger than I. (I hate going to Best Buy and knowing more than the salespeople.) (Or Circuit City, etc.)

    Anyway…you can bet I’ll be doing better gear checks now on Kara raids. Anything that is normally stored in the garage is NOT permitted.


  22. I’m Knocking on the door to 50 myself.
    Build my own computers (Duel core is less than 6 months old)
    Play WOW
    Game Admin on several FPS servers.

    So, I’m busy. 🙂

    And yes, there ARE some sick sick people out there..

    My first ever guild back Pre-BC, and people would come to instances or Raids with ZERO FA. PVP extreme, so they didn’t farm for mats, and never had any money for repairs, not to mention not having any Pots or Food buffs. (Too much trouble to level Cooking, or Fishing, or a Main Profession) Why even GO on an instance run or raid if you can’t afford it?
    Those are the same people who roll on EVERY drop. We’ve all seen them.

    That’s like going on a camping trip with the guys, but you show up in T-shirt and Shorts, and expect everyone else to feed you, house you, lend you clothes, and transport you there. MUST be their charming personality.


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